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Class 6(66)

Judas Priest: Point of entry

25/06/10  ||  Daemonomania

Introduction

As my journey into the Priesthood continues, I came upon a copy of “Point of entry” for trade from a fine Philippino. Fear gripped my heart. It was a bit of a gamble. Not only had I been ripped off by a trader from that country before, but also knew only two of these JP tracks. And one was through this hilarious video. The lust for more Judas overwhelmed my good judgment. After many months of waiting (during which some border agent probably taped the CD to his shoe, shiny side up, to peek under the skirts of a local transvestite) it finally arrived.

The verdict – this is an entry of middling quality in the great Judography. Better than the dreaded “Turbo” based on what IG says, worse than “Screaming for vengeance”. “PoE” displays a balancing act between 80’s commercial stadium material, the more classic rock leanings of their past, and the barest hint of the orgasmic metal aggression that would characterize “Painkiller”. Surely ‘tis’nt a GREAT disc by anyone’s standards, but there’s enough enjoyment here to satiate any developing old-school fan.

Songwriting

6.5. Some classics. Some crap. And certainly one of the most obnoxious choruses ever penned via “You say yes”. I say NO. Besides “Heading out to the highway”, “Desert plains”, and a charitable inclusion of “Solar angels,” certified Judaic A-list material is actually kinda scarce. Once you’ve removed the standards and lame, uninspired hairmetal, what is left? The cheese. And I’ll happily nominate “Hot rockin’”, “Turning circles”, and “Troubleshooter” as some extra sharp Vermont goodness.

The more formulaic tracks were clearly meant for radio play. Music written for the radio rarely ages well. Are there exceptions to that rule? Of course not. Being completely objective, all signs point to the radio as a siren luring songwriting onto the rocks. Hard a-port, Priest! Hard a-port!!!

Production

8. Good, clear sound allowing you to ingest the Muenster. I can’t really write a whole paragraph about it. It sounds exactly the same as the production on “Screaming…” to me, so if someone already covered that just go ahead and read their goddamn review.

Guitars

6.5. Overall this really is just a 6.5 album, and since guitars are one of the defining factors of any metal band (unless you’re this dude), the score fits the crime. Not that Tipton and Downing toss an avocado salad here. But was the dynamic duo trying? Doesn’t seem so. There is a strong sense of meh permeating many of the riffs that would quickly be banished on “Screaming”. And completely stomped out and buttraped on “Painkiller”.

Vocals

8. Rob “the Job” Halford is behind the mic, so less than an 8 would be blasphemy. But for a man who is usually in 10 to 11ventymillion range 8 is pretty sad. The Metal God sticks in the mid-range and that beautiful scream is a rare luxury. I like his burly tone in “Heading out for the highway”, and his powerful lungs carry “Desert plains” and “Solar angels”. Plus the combination dinner platter of saucy vocals and suggestive lyrics on “Trouble(money)shooter” waves a bursting banana hammock right in your face. Halford also seems to be trapped in mehland for most of the proceedings though. And again, that fucken “You say yes” chorus. Ugh. The same dude went on to sing “All guns blazing”? Get out.

Bass

4. Nothing to say here. Ian “over the” Hill plays bass for Judas Priest, and has done so since 1886. Some of the hairsprayed groupies deflected off of Halford’s metal cocksheath must land on his lap. Way to go dude.

Drums

7. Yes, the man’s drum work was a bit pedestrian. But think about the time period. No one could have known that extreme kitbashing would rise to the level of fetishism in the metal world. Throw Mr. Holland’s opuses in any other late 70’s or 80’s band and he would have done just fine. The rolling thunder of “Desert plains” alone redeems him for rather halfhearted entries elsewhere on PoE.

Lyrics

3. For the most part, they make “Twist of Cain” look like Shakespeare. A sample, you ask?

Come on, come on now what you say
Somebody say you leave today
What’s this thing you’re doin’ to me
What’s this fool you’re tryin’ to be

It sounds better when Roberto is singing it, sure. But that doesn’t mean that 89% of the lyrical content on here isn’t dumb as a box of cocks. Can the audience relate to what’s being talked about? If the audience wants to go, wants to go, wants to go HOT ROCKIN! then yes, they certainly can.

Cover art

2. The cover of my super saver nice price edition is pathetic. Just an elongated brownish shiny triangle pointing to a sky at…sunset? Sunrise? Retard? Who approved this? I sense the dark hand of the Avant G(u)arde. The real cover, a hazy road leading into some desert mountains and big-ass letters spelling out the album title – better. Does either image depict an awesome aluminum eagle bearing down at supersonic speed to eviscerate its prey? How about a chromed-out alien blasting across the sky atop his trusted dragoncycle? Nein and keine. Even the “Turbo” cover trumps it.

Logo

Far be it from me to judge the Judas Priest logo. Doing so could only incite the revolution and invite retribution.

Booklet

2. Again, thanks to super-saving or nicely pricely or cheaper keeper my booklet is akin to chomping down on a cow tooth in the midst of your Five Napkin Burger. No, that’s an incorrect comparison. Eating a delicious and expensive cheeseburger and getting that nasty surprise would be unexpected. After looking at the cover, a shit booklet was none too shocking.

Overall and ending rant

Unlike the trvest of ancient metalheads, I started with the evil death metal of the early 90’s and am just now working my way back to the classics. It is a delightful process. You find more and more gems that escape greatest hits compilations with each Motorhead and Priest album you buy. In that spirit of exploration, I’m glad to have “Point of entry”. Never would have heard great tunes like “Solar angels” or “Troubleshooter” without it. Is it half as good as the other Halford & Co. LLC discs in my collection? Nope. But that’s OK. It is yet another step historyward to an era where denim was cool, men rode Harleys through the wasteland all night meet their multigendered lovers, and angels were totally solar.

6,5

  • Information
  • Released: 1981
  • Label: Columbia/Sony
  • Website: “www.judaspriest.com”: http://www.judaspriest.com/
  • Band
  • Rob Halford: vocals
  • Glenn Tipton: guitars
  • K.K. Downing: guitars
  • Ian Hill: bass
  • Dave Holland: drums
  • Tracklist
  • 01. Heading Out to the Highway
  • 02. Don’t Go
  • 03. Hot Rockin’
  • 04. Turning Circles
  • 05. Desert Plains
  • 06. Solar Angels
  • 07. You Say Yes
  • 08. All the Way
  • 09. Troubleshooter
  • 10. On the Run
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